Life…it’s busy, hectic, stressful, complicated, and overall, pretty tiring at times. There’s so much stimulation around you it’s hard to focus on the very small but most powerful aspects of your life. This includes your love life, more specifically your love marriage…or lack thereof. If you immediately want to shift your current situation, even though you feel burden by life (kids, business, home chores, and just trying to pee by yourself), these simple, yet forgotten secrets will take your breath away. Experience love again…your love marriage even when life (your feelings in a brief, unhappy moment) says otherwise.
Redirect Your Focus
If you truly desire a love marriage that literally takes your breath away in awe and adoration (not crazy-angry frustration), you’ve got to focus on what you want and not what you don’t want. In other words, stop thinking about all the complaints you have about your spouse.
Begin to manifest in your mind’s eye what you want, desire, and love about your spouse. If you want him to cuddle with you more without expecting sex, then start to see & feel him cuddle with you. In your mind’s eye throughout the day, smile about how you like his touch and warmth when you are beside him. Bring the memory to life!
Be careful though… this simple and newfound secret you can start now definitely works, but take note of any negative. It’s only complaining once again in a new way. That’s just going to put you right back where you started.
Just like in business, we look at the exciting aspects of working with a new client or customer as well as the not so exciting aspects (driving time, additional phone time, etc.) of a new client/customer. However, despite the unfavorable aspects what you focus on is what makes you bad@ss awesome at what you do and THAT makes you smile.
Do the same for your desired love marriage that can begin immediately and create more of the desired love marriage you’ve always wanted!
Live Like You Love Marriage
Do you truly hate your situation? If not, act like it. Head up, shoulders back, heart full like you love your marriage despite any past set backs. Say hello, just because. Touch him, just because. Serve and try something new, just because.
Start living like you want to live in the marriage. Write down what you are avoiding on purpose. Then choose ONE thing you will shift this week and no longer avoid that particular action.
A love marriage is an action… love is the verb. It will take a little getting used to – it’s going to feel a bit awkward, but here’s the thing. It’s still simple to do. You just forgot for a season.
Say I Love You
It’s not necessarily that you forgot to say it…you just are feelin’ like saying it at times. That’s okay. You don’t have to feel it to say it. Just say it. As long as it’s intentional, meaningful to you, it will be reflected in your voice.
Maybe you already say it a lot now, but you don’t hear it back. Then try something new. Say “I love you” with a note, a gesture of kindness, or simply just being next to them without saying anything! You’d be surprised how many people thrive on quality time without the need for words. Play around with the different ways that convey,
“I love you.”
Smile At Them Like It’s The First Time
“In other words, smiling can trick your brain into believing you’re happy which can then spur actual feelings of happiness.”
Fake it till ya make it hack. Sometimes in business, you’ll use it to ‘fake’ confidence when you are doing something new and you are uncertain about the outcome or how it will turn out. So you fake your confidence. This is not a bad thing. As a matter of fact, in my own personal experience, I’ve gained more confidence the more I ‘faked’ it. Next thing I know…it’s natural. This will happen for you too.
That’s not too far fetched from what a smile will get you. Fake your smile at your spouse. Pretend you are holding chopsticks in-between your teeth causing your cheeks to pull back into a… yup – fake smile.
Whether it’s open-mouthed or a sexy closed lip… smile at them anyway. A long forgotten trait that used to happen during your early courting/dating days. Bring those memories back to life and smile!
Remember those nights you’d stay up late on the phone or on the porch before departing? Those nights you’d just listen to his voice, his breathing, and his words? He may not be saying much now or perhaps you really don’t want to hear what he has to say. Well, try this. Bring back the memory of wanting to hear him talk to you. Ask questions you want to hear the answer to and just…listen.
Listen again to his words, voice, tone, inflections, and breathing. Allow those forgotten moments to pull you back into a time you loved it and bring those very real feelings into your heart today.
Listen to your heart…your desires, what you deserve, and will delight you in a love marriage. Just remember to do so.
[thrive_custom_box title=”” style=”light” type=”color” color=”#b588e2″ border=””]These 5 little secrets maybe seem simple, but you realize, it’s really hard for you. What might be getting in the way of doing some of these things in your marriage? [/thrive_custom_box]